Harvard Reveals All

Summers Speaks Out

In a face-to-face interview, Joe Summers, beer-drinking brother of the former Harvard president, revealed the inner workings of the highest level of the elite unniversity.

"First of all," said Joe, " the family was not , I repeat not, involved in insider training in the former Soviet Union. Recent reports in the London Review of Books claiming that he was somehow implicated in one of his friends shenanigans are absolutely untrue." Further, said Joe, "The loss of $26.5 million in fines because of those unsavory events had nothing to do with my brother's downfall. After all, that kind of money is small change at Harvard! No, it was his disgusting sexism that probably finished him off."

Sitting on the back porch of his shack in Alabama, Joe said, "I was sort of hoping that Anna Nicole was going to be the new prez, but oops! she was gone and they were stuck with some Cliffy. Oh well."