Meek Getting Earth; Pushy get Everything Else
Orlando, Florida: NASA announced today that the meek would be given everything on earth, while the audacious would get everything else. This announcement coincided with the Bush Administration concession that global climate change is in fact a major issue, that polar bears were drowning in the melting Arctic and that New York would not need to replace the World Trade Center since it would all soon be under water.
"What the hell," said the President. "Let them have a few good days! We're leaving for Uranus pretty soon and taking the Saudis with us."
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