Eight Dead in Attempted Landing

Eight Dead in Attempted Landing

Evolution News

Provincetown, MA.

The latest group of Atlantic aquanauts ran into difficulties in Massachusetts Bay. Of the thirteen “travelers”, eight have died and 5 have returned to home base. The desparate effort to find a land-based sanctuary from polluted and increasingly warm waters of the Atlantic has resulted in the death of 72 dolphins in the past year, as well as a lesser toll among whale allies. President Flipper is considering calling a halt to the project.

Meanwhile, the Pacific (underwater) opposition condemned the attempted landing as “Lysenko-ism of the worst sort.” The Pacific opposition has focused on tsunamis as the most effective response to the human assault on the Blue Planet, but their latest efforts have been condemned as terrorism. The Great White Whale, masked leader of the underwater insurgency, has said that “there can be no truce with those who desecrate our home and eat our flesh.”